I was taking my walk today and saw the egret. He was just standing there, thinking egret-y thoughts, I'm sure. I like how egrets fish, though. They stare down at the water, then flash nab a fish before you even notice their head moving.
This is way unlike the pelican.
I saw pelicans in the wild a few years back for the first time, and was amazed. They fly, see a fish, dive and BAM! smack the water, then are up and water 'n stuff is dribbling out of their pouches as fish tails flap around the edges.
Someone said, "They catch fish by stunning them. They smack the water so hard, the fish is stunned, doesn't move, the pelican scoops it up and it's lunch!"
Except the impact of the hit on the water damages the pelican.
"Hurts their eyes. They eventually go blind. When they can't see the fish, they can't catch it. So they starve to death."
This, folks. This is "intelligent design."
Reminds me of the joke about the two boys wanking off that are caught by one's father. Dad says, "Keep that up, and you'll go blind!"
After he leaves, one boy looks at the other and says "Let's just do it 'til we need glasses!"
Okay, so there was intelligent design in that. Not the elderly joke, mind. Just the ability for guys to, um. You know. Have a way to not pester their wives during that time of the month.
So what was the intelligence behind women having a way to , um, satisfy themselves in ways that men will never be able to live up to? Except me, of course!